Tapping for Grief


I just saw a Facebook post in which someone’s boyfriend couldn’t understand why she was so upset about her mother’s death. After all, it’s expected. You see, her mother was a drug addict. I can imagine the responsibility her daughter may have felt when her mother died. I can imagine that she wondered what she could have or should have done to help her mother. I can imagine it because I had experienced some of those feelings myself.

Why be upset when your mother died when she was nearly 89 years old and had dementia? Well, that was my mother and I mourned hard for two years when she died in February of 2013. I had been the one who had been watching out for her for the past 6 years. I moved her 1000 miles to live near me when we discovered she couldn’t quite handle life’s day-to-day demands on her own anymore. We found a lovely independent living facility and she loved and was successful there for several years. I found an awesome pill dispensing machine that I would fill for her every few weeks and it would call out to her twice day, “Time to take your medications, please press the red button!”

She even found a lovely man to share meals and walks with. It was really good. But then the dementia got worse and she started wandering at 2 a.m. and knocking on doors and I knew then that it was time for a safer facility. Once she moved things were not so great. The new facility stopped giving her the dementia medications and she lost a lot of ground and was moved into the dementia unit after just a few weeks.

She often became agitated and she had stomach pains. I was pretty sure that acupuncture would help her. I did my research and made an appointment with someone that was highly recommended and took the day off from work to bring her to him. Well she absolutely refused to let him work on her. I tried to coax and cajole and when it all failed and we were b